As we often say, TDD is a lifestyle program, not a “club game / night game / whatever game” kind of PUA company. I like this, because it answers the obvious but ignored question that PUA companies have had for years:
“What do I do when I want to date someone?”
It always amazed me that those ‘instructors’ never seemed to have a very good answer. Usually it was something ridiculous like “You shouldn’t get in a relationship because you need to practice your skillset.” What is that supposed to mean? Aren’t we in this in order to figure out what we’re missing in our lives? Aren’t we here because we want to figure out both a) the kinds of women we’re interested in, and b) why we aren’t able to draw those women into our lives?”
Well, most of the guys that were part of that initial rush of companies weren’t looking for those kinds of answers. They were just trying to get laid. And they ended up filling the market with fuzzy-hat wearing, stupid-jargon speaking social retards who made everyone in this industry look bad. Is there any doubt that Troy recently declined the invitation to speak at the PUA Summit in Texas? What on earth would he possibly be able to learn from that group of guys? Nothing. Because all they are is one big gimmick. And I don’t even think they’re trying to trick women into sleeping with them. They’re actually tricking the men out of their money. And it’s painful to watch.
I’m glad I never really bought into all that stuff. I mean, I filled myself with it quite a bit, back in 2007-2008, but it never felt 100% right to me. Even when I was considering working for one of “those companies”, and it got pretty far into the process, I remember my blogging and discussions with the instructors there were filled with talks about “the next step.” As in, “we have all this right here. But there’s still something else…” I refused to be content with what I was teaching. I wanted to actually figure out how to teach what guys were looking for when they invested $1500 into 48 hours of instruction.
I was fired from that apprenticeship.
But now I’m getting to know a girl that I’m seriously interested in. She’s sweet and funny and I we have a lot of fun together. When TDD talks about mutual agreement, it’s not a gimmick. It’s a way to get comfortable with each other, and that’s what the two of us are. I transitioned to sexual topics and we ended up with a very fun discussion on how loud sex can get before it gets distracting (answer? 47 decibels!) We met up again, saw a movie, had lunch, and eventually ended up softly making out while watching bad TV at my place. All of this is wonderful, a real life romance in every sense of the word. And if I was part of the “community” I would be torn apart in the forums by single men, typing alone in their bedrooms, blasting me for letting myself get attached, and warning that if I didn’t keep practicing, I’d lose all my skills and have to start over again when, inevitably, I messed up the relationship and she dumped me. They would then go to a porn site, masturbate, and go to bed. Alone.
I don’t regret leaving that community behind. And I don’t hesitate for a second if I see someone like that enter our forum. I kick them out gladly. Unless Troy already has a hold of them. In which case I prop the door open for him while he kicks them out.
This isn’t a teenagers wet dream. This is real life. And we teach you how to be successful in it.
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